Him: Are you in traffic?
Me: (wondering why he wants a traffic report) A little bit, but mostly it’s moving along well…
Him: Good. Hike your skirt up over your thighs.
Me: Um. Okay…
Him: Now put your fingers in your pussy and keep them there until you arrive at work or
I tell you otherwise.
Me: (realization dawning) Umph.
(Some time later.)
Me: Um. There’s a bus next to me. The driver can look down and see that my skirt is hiked up!
Him: Are you at a stoplight?
Me: Yes. I’m holding my arm across my lap so she can’t see what I’m doing! But I can’t take my hand away from my pussy because she’ll see me move it and know what I’m doing!
Him: Good. I haven’t told you to stop – so you shouldn’t be moving your hand anyway. Keep it up, kitty.
(A very short time later.)
Me: (turning red in mortification) I just had to drive through a construction zone, going slow because he had a sign! I think…I think they could see!
Him: Good. You’re doing your part to promote boners and lady boners everywhere…
(A moment later.)
Him: Are you at your last turn into work?
Me: (wondering how I’m going to clean the wet, gooey mess off my fingers before I go into my office) Yes.
Him: Good girl. Now lick your paw clean, kitty.
That was my drive into work today. How was yours?