Author Archives: Jade

Day 17 – Satisfaction

I’m laying in bed, having woken from an evening nap to write this post. I have a bit of a cat-canary feel of satisfaction going on, of luxuriating in my space in the universe at the moment. So of course I had to take a picture. I realized when I went to post it that it doesn’t show the lovely bruises that adorn my flesh, and that are a part of my adjusted attitude, so I will have to correct that oversight, but suffice it to say, there are a few, and I can’t help myself but to poke and rub at them throughout the day. A really fantastic scene the other night is not the only reason for my change in mood – I’ve been very judiciously doing all the things that I know will help; all the practical things as well as self-care and self-compassion things, and theyRead more …

Day 16 – Stop with the Time Machine Already

Jun 16, 2019 | Posted by in Boob Day, Every Damn Day in June 2019 | 0

I’m just going to have to give in and start from now. No more time machining. Except wait, this was taken last Saturday, specifically to post over the weekend for Hy’s Boobday having been extended to include the weekend. But…eh…work conference being what it was, posting the image didn’t happen. So I’m posting it tonight! Me, in Dallas. Practically the only fun I had while there.

Day 13 – More Time Machine

Jun 15, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019, Sinful Sunday | 15

In order to make this post square with the rules of Sinful Sunday (it’s about the image – one you’ve taken yourself or had taken of you) I broke up Day 13 into two posts. This one is about AFTER the game… Day 13 – A Different Game Prior to going to the bar, V set up a “game” of our own – I had picked out two canes during a previous game, one I “liked” and one I didn’t like. Whatever the score was, he would take the difference between the scores and take that x10. If the Blues won, he’d hit me that many times with the “good” cane. If they lost, he’d use the bad one. That night, as this, the Blues won. To the song “Gloria” (for some reason that was the Blue’s theme song this year) on repeat, he whacked me 30x with a whangeeRead more …

Day 13 – Time Machine

Jun 15, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019 | 0

We’re going back in a time machine to the posts that I wrote the other days but didn’t post. Mostly because I don’t want to revise them to reflect the fact that I’m posting it today even though I wrote it the other day. Writer’s prerogative.  Day 13 – A Hockey Game I actually DID write yesterday. Quite a lot. But I didn’t get that post (feedback on Round 5 of the Smut Marathon) finished in time to post it. I was at my local corner bar with V for the seventh and last game of the Blues vs Bruins for the Stanley Cup Final, and I was sadly mistaken if I was going to be able to focus enough to write while the game was on. So I’m taking the liberty of pretending I’m in a time machine this morning and pretending that I wrote up our adventure lastRead more …

Day ???

Jun 14, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019, Everyday Jade | 6

I’ve really fallen down on posting daily. I’ve been writing nearly every day, but haven’t had the energy to finish anything up to publish. I’ve been caught up in a severe case of malaise. I had to look up the exact meaning of the word. I’ve read it, heard it and even used it, but when I was searching myself for what exactly this emotion is that I am feeling, and that word came to mind, I thought I should look it up. malaise [ ma-leyz, -muh-; French ma-lez ] noun a condition of general bodily weakness or discomfort, often marking the onset of a disease. a vague or unfocused feeling of mental uneasiness, lethargy, or discomfort. Definitely number two, though the way I’ve been feeling in my skin could count for number one as well. Not disease, but dis-ease: I’m uncomfortable in my body right now. And in myRead more …

Day 11 – Catching Up

Jun 11, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019, Everyday Jade | 0

I’m sitting here in bed, smelling like lavender soap and the bath. I’ve had a couple rum-and-somethings and I am feeling – finally – relaxed after the stressful conference weekend. I didn’t want to write. I’ve missed days while at my work conference, no way to write or anything else during, but now I am home. All I wanted was a drink, a book, and my bed. Instead I went out to my (hopefully) flourishing city garden, watered and weeded, because it needed me, and I, it. I needed to destress, and weeding does that for me. Like cleaning and organizing my closets. But outside. With living things. Then I came inside, and really didn’t want to bother with a bath, but knew that, also, would help. And it did. So here I am, now, smelling good and feeling clean, and having so many things to say… But also. I’mRead more …

Day 8 – Connections

Today’s prompt for Insta’s #DearJune is connection. I love the prompt. There are so many ways I can go with this. But…not in my Insta (this is the ongoing, internal, debate I have: make a Pieces-of-Jade Insta? But what about my daughter and other vanilla people who now follow me?) Forging those connections, and then keeping them separate, is fucking hard. It’s why I mostly stopped doing it with friends and sister. I fucking HATE having to cover up. And I SUCK at it. I’ve been pretty open on my FB. I’m pretty sure most of anyone who friends me knows I am poly. But this other thing…kink…  No. I have a lot of friends that accept me as poly, and even bisexual, but I just can’t be out there as kinky. It’s NOT that I am ashamed of what I do. It’s that I don’t feel comfortable sharing my sexRead more …

Day 7 – Risks

I’ve missed and/or jumbled up my days. My participation has not been 100% on #DearJune either, but I’m okay with that. Well, I think about it a bit, because I couldn’t be me if I didn’t let it bother me a little, but not so bad as it might have done. I give myself a frowny face and then move on. Anyway, here’s the post I made on Instagram for (what I think was) Day 7, the prompt being “risks.” On the heels of a post that felt entirely appropriate at the time – and I will not deny my own experience of things – but in the light of day I realize was…an emotional reaction, and possibly not the best representation of the situation…this post means a lot to me. It reminds of the risks I took when I decided to give my submission and my love to another.Read more …

I’m here (Oops, Day 5)

Jun 6, 2019 | Posted by in Being Poly, Every Damn Day in June, Everyday Jade | 1

I’m writing. On my phone. Because no energy to sit up and do this the right way in my Chromebook. Just wanted to confirm that yes, I’m here, I’m writing, cuz it’s June. And…well you know the drill. I’m better. Or getting there. V and I talked. The past – and the mistakes made – are not things that can be changed. The present is what it is, and I have no control over anyone else’s decisions or actions, only my own. I’ve gotta let go of both of those things and be in the here and now, for my own happiness and mental health. So here I am. Doing the thing. We’ll see how it goes.

Day 4 – Forgetting

The prompt for today’s #dearjune is not an easy one for me. I thought about making light of it, joking about how I have a memory like a sieve, haha. (I do. Not so haha, but there it is. Some people have good brains, mine’s a little hole-y.) But I couldn’t do it and write something truthful, and, if I am going to put words to paper for posterity (or as long as computer memory lasts) I choose to always write my truth. I get that it might not be someone else’s – I know the story about the elephant and the blind men – but it’s mine, and that is all I can write. So of course, the words “memory” and “forgetting” always have to do with W. Even when I don’t want them to. Wait, what? What does that mean, “When I don’t want them to”? That soundsRead more …