Being Poly

Thoughts on non-monogamy and stories from my own polyamorous life.

Boundaries with the Romantic Guy

Jun 26, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Kinky Stuff | 0

Once upon a time, what seems like eons ago, I wrote this as the beginning of a new blog post: “I am embarking on yet another new adventure tonight, and as I do so I am filled with trepidation and a sharp longing to be back in the “old days,” the days before he died, my days with Warren. I am missing him so much in this moment that it’s hard to muster up the excitement I felt yesterday when I finalized my plans; or even the nervousness of last night when I contemplated what will most likely happen tonight. So what exactly am I doing tonight? I’m having what I consider to be my first “real” date with the “potential love-interest” I mentioned in an earlier post. It’s been awhile since I went on a first date. It’s been an even longer while since I dated a vanilla person.”Read more …

Dirty Innocence

I laughed a bit to myself when I decided to post this for Sinful Sunday. I mean, it’s just not all that sinful, right? And yet…I find the image oddly sexy and yet comforting at the same time. This is me, now – this is my dirty-girl-ness, so unlike it was back then, when I masturbated on a dirty, grimy floor while W pissed on me.  And yet, sitting on the deck overlooking my little city yard, cooling off after spending the morning on my hands and knees gardening, I am happy. Yes, happy and content with my life. There’s a little more to this story, I suppose. I sent this to my new guy, the Romantic, maybe I shall call him, who is at least nominally vanilla. I guess at some point I need to fill ya’ll in on what’s been going on on that front. But for now, sufficeRead more …

Hello from the Big Easy

Jun 9, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Everyday Jade, Scavenger Hunt | 1

Guess where we are! A work conference has brought me to New Orleans. The Bear and I are AirBnB-ing it for a couple days before we must decamp to the conference hotel and I have to put in a couple two or three 12-hour days, endure cocktail parties and an awards banquet, and oh yeah, pretend to be vanilla. My job is the one space in my life where I am not completely out, though I am making inroads on the poly front. I’m excited to be exploring a new city with Ad. We’ve both been here before – me most recently for a weekend-long swinger party with W – but that was a lifetime ago. This trip is so far removed from that that it might have happened to a different person. So Ad and I are exploring it afresh, and making it our own. This guidebook was left onRead more …

Space of My Own

I am always always always late on these Wicked Wednesday posts, even when they are something I want to write about. Even though I get the email as soon as Marie Rebel posts the prompt. Maybe I should make that a blogging goal. I have decided to make myself modest (very modest) writing goals this year, because, in the past, that has worked to some degree for me.. Nothing like the goals I have set in the past (a story a month submitted for publication? How crazy was that? Even crazier that every one of them got published…) but something to work for, something to give me a little boost whenever I make a goal. So? Maybe doing – at minimum – the Wicked Wednesday prompts. We’ll see. Still cogitating on that one. Anyway, I digress. This past Wednesday’s prompt was about “space.” The prompt talked about space like, youRead more …

Too Little

I walked home in the unseasonably warm temperatures tonight, trudging across the common ground between my building and Adam’s in a one piece pajama suit and my tennis shoes. I’d had laundry to do; we’d had dinner and watched The Magicians together. It’s a weekly ritual – the washer and dryer are at his place, as is cable TV and the dog. But I always come home to the Treehouse, because I can’t sleep with the dog – even tho sometimes I do, here at my place, when I can talk Adam into bringing him over and staying the night. We have settled into a routine. Monday night is school and then I’m out at V’s; Tuesday we sometimes do dinner at my place or go out, but Adam usually goes home afterwards so that I can study; Wednesday is as outlined above. Sometimes he comes back over with me,Read more …

And how did YOU spend Valentine’s?

Feb 15, 2017 | Posted by in 2017 February PhotoFest, Being Poly | 0

Valentine’s Day hasn’t been too big a holiday in my life; most of my various partners have eschewed the force-fed “romance” of it…though honestly I have a tiny bit of the romantic in me and I wouldn’t throw out cards and flowers, or the man or woman that brought them. ;-)  Usually, I do end up going out to dinner before or after the day, as Adam and I did on Sunday; and as V and I will tomorrow. This is how I spent the “real” holiday: Books, pencils, notebooks, homework and computers. And socks, of course.

Mountains, Rocks, Rolling Stones & Hummingbirds

Jan 28, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly | 2

Adam is a rock. Warren was a rolling stone. V says he is a mountain. I’m a hummingbird. I have always said Adam is my rock. Stable and solid, safe and secure, but not immovable. It takes a good bit of effort, but I can nudge him this way and that, and even pick him up and carry him about if needed. He’s always there for me to fly home to when I need solidity and security. Warren was a rolling stone. Secure and strong, too, but more easily moved, and with the added bonus of being able/willing to initiate movement – to roll – on his own. Viper is, in his own words, a mountain. He’s the immovable center of the world around which his wife and daughter – and now me – live their lives, returning to succor in his steadfastness, knowing he cannot be moved or shaken.Read more …

So much to say…

I’ve heard  from a couple of friends, wondering where I am, if I’m well. I am. Well. And thinking about writing all the time. But then…I don’t. I get busy with school and work and life and the urge to record the doings of my life just isn’t there. I don’t know what to say anymore. I don’t know what to talk about. My life is good, my relationships are stable, I’m “rolling the ball forward,” as V says. But I don’t have anything very interesting to write about. I loved writing about sex. And it’s not like we don’t have good sex. Some pretty spectacular sex. But I don’t often find myself driven to talk about it here. I loved writing about kink. It’s not like we don’t have our brand of kink. Sometimes it’s kinky as fuck. But, again, I don’t often find myself compelled to share thoseRead more …

A Birthday Weekend in the Smokies

(Ed. note: This was started the weekend of my birthday weekend, when we went to Gatlinburg. As usual, life has intervened in me getting this posted in a timely fashion, but, well, better late than never?) It’s 1 a.m. here, and I’m sitting at my little round table-for-two in front of the patio window, the door open so I can hear the breeze soughing through the trees, sipping on a rumchata and vodka. I just walked in about a half hour ago from a perfectly lovely weekend in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, with Adam and a group of friends at a cabin (they included V and his wife, E.) It’s so peaceful here. I thought all the way home that I’d be sad and lonely, when we finally got home and Adam went over to the Big Condo and V was home with his wife. But instead as soon as I walkedRead more …