Life Before

Girls’ Weekend, cont.

Sep 20, 2018 | Posted by in Life Before, Scavenger Hunt, Throwback Thursday | 0

First, in honor of the weekend, a Scavenger Hunt that I did years ago in Chicago, after a 4-mile walk down the Lake Michigan shoreline with Ad and W. I had a couple of reminders about that trip while I was in Chicago this last time, so it seemed fitting that I would do a Throwback Thursday Scavenger Hunt featuring it. I tried to find the posts I wrote about the trip in Kink & Poly, so I could reference it for anyone was interested in reading about it, but that was a little too deep down memory lane, and I gave up. In any case, the memory of these pictures makes me happy. It was a trip where W and Ad and I had brought W’s granddaughter’s moose stuffie along with us and took pictures of it everywhere, so he could share his travels with her. And where, whenRead more …

More Ocean. Sort of.

Sep 4, 2018 | Posted by in Everyday Jade, Life Before, Who Is Pieces of Jade? | 2

I’m sitting here at my computer in my 3rd-story room, looking out over the dark city streets, while Ad and Felix slumber in my bed. We have had a full weekend already, with yet another day of fun planned, but I am unable to sleep. I hope three fingers of Fireball and this posting will give me some respite. Ever since the prompt for the last Kink of the Week, I have been – carefully – sorting through images of the ocean/beach vacations I have taken. So many beaches, so much life lived. So much joy. And, looking at the ones with W, so much…  Not sorrow, but…I don’t know. Nostalgia. Longing for what might have been; for what was lost. I look at those images and I can almost feel my hands cupping that beloved face; almost see his grin, still see the love shining in his eyes. IsRead more …

The Lure of the Sea

I was born in California. I did not, however and contrary to what most people seem to think when I tell them this, live near the ocean. There were very few beaches in my childhood, as a matter of fact, but there were enough to instill in me a lifelong love of the sea and “big water” as I often call it. Does that make the ocean a kink of mine? I think not, though I have done a lot of kinky things by the sea. And it’s not only the ocean, it’s any big body of water, although I by far prefer the sea. I was born in the Bay Area, but not anywhere near the water. I spent the first 7 or 8 years of my life in one or another of the nondescript, endlessly sprawling, “bedroom communities” of San Francisco. (That’s not as sexy as it soundsRead more …

Q is for Quarterflash

Anyone remember the song “Harden My Heart” by Quarterflash? https://youtu.be/Aqd61YG-P10Damn but it’s a great song. I thought so then, and I still do. I like songs of women standing up to asshole men. Walking away when they aren’t treated right. I haven’t known very many of that kind of man, actually. I’ve been blessed with a surfeit of good men in my life, even my exes, except for one: my first husband. And yet I was wild about that man(child). Crazy in love with him, and he with me, except when he was drinking hard alcohol. Then he was obsessed with me, insanely jealous, and I was afraid of him. I don’t think of him often, but that song was playing in some bar or restaurant the other night and for just those few moments I was transported back in time – jesus, more than thirty years ago. I wasRead more …

G is for Goodbye

Apr 7, 2018 | Posted by in A-Z Blogging Challenge, Life Before | 2

“Goodbye Norma Jean,” in particular. Why that? Well. Let me tell you. I’d been flailing about for a few days, reaching for, and never quite finding, a good “G” word. Of course there is “Gratitude.” And that is always an important one for me to muse on, to internalize, to write and think about. But…every other word so far has felt like…inspiration. A gift, urging me to write, in a time when writing hasn’t been a thing. How do I explain it, when a thing is so important to you…when it’s such an integral part of you that imagining it gone is inconceivable…and then it is. Gone. Just like that. A neat, precise incision cut out of your very center, like with an apple corer. A hole punched in you. That was how my writing has been for me. Until just these last few days. I don’t know what itRead more …

A is for Arousal

Reading Marie of Rebel’s Notes’ Sinful Sunday post today reminded me that April is the month for the A-Z Blogging Challenge. I participated one year a few years ago, and another year we played our own A-Z blogging game, our public-rope-themed Alphabet Challenge (which was way more fun than any three people should be allowed to have together, and gave me so many wonderful memories with W – all chronicled in my then-blog, Kink and Poly.) I am still awed by the sheer volume of writings I did there, by the friends I made through that blog, by the way it not only chronicled our lives – W’s, Ad’s and mine, as well as my children’s and others who we came into contact with – through the years, but by the way it informed our lives together. It was, in the way that a location sometimes becomes a character of its own inRead more …

Of Subdrop & Self-Care

Dec 5, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Kinky Stuff, Life Before, Relationship Stuff | 2

Whoa…it’s been awhile since I’ve had a bona fide case of subdrop. Long enough that I can’t really remember when it last was. I didn’t even drop after the event a few weekends ago, when I spent two full days and nights with both guys, got cut on, and beat up, and made to fuck a dragon cock in public while Viper shoved a glass dildo up my ass. Oh, and I happened to be wrapped up tight in neon pink vet-wrap so that I looked like an amputee. With a ballgag in my mouth and vet-wrap over my eyes too, up on a table where a dungeon full of kinksters could watch as I was made to fuck myself silly, grinding helplessly against Baldy, the dragon cock in my pussy and V pushing the glass wand in and out of my ass. It’s that part that is most embarrassing,Read more …

Memory Lane

Nov 1, 2017 | Posted by in Life Before, Wicked Wednesday | 15

I have resisted all week in writing about this week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt: “Memory Lane”. But I couldn’t keep my mind from going there. Such a dangerous place to go for me. Even thinking about it sends a quiver of dread, of anxiety, through me. I live with my memories – with the pain of them – so close to the surface, even now. Today, for some unknown reason, as I typed “November 1” in a document, my breath caught, tears blinded me. I don’t know why, or what triggered the response. I’m afraid to look back, to search for the source of the pain. I keep thinking, berating myself, “Aren’t you the fuck over it yet?” And yet I know I’m not. I have dozens of Scavenger Hunts that I – we – completed…but I can’t bring myself to post them. Even now, almost three years on, I justRead more …

Sleeping Single in a Double Bed

Oct 2, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Everyday Jade, Life Before | 0

I love my bed. My bedroom is not quite the sanctuary that the one in the Treehouse was, though it’s getting there. But my bed! Newly purchased for this new space (the iron canopy wouldn’t fit), with a new comforter and (as usual) more pillows than any human has a right to, I LOVE snuggling down into it, burrowing myself into the pillows and blankets or starfishing and sleeping crooked. It’s hard to get out of bed in the morning. Not just cuz I’m sleepy, but because I don’t want to leave the comfort and sweetness of my bed. Mostly, I sleep there alone. In all the seven years that I was with W, I maybe slept alone three times. I was always with one or the other or both. And I loved it. I hated sleeping alone. But now…now I sleep alone more often than not, and most often,Read more …

Dirty Innocence

I laughed a bit to myself when I decided to post this for Sinful Sunday. I mean, it’s just not all that sinful, right? And yet…I find the image oddly sexy and yet comforting at the same time. This is me, now – this is my dirty-girl-ness, so unlike it was back then, when I masturbated on a dirty, grimy floor while W pissed on me.  And yet, sitting on the deck overlooking my little city yard, cooling off after spending the morning on my hands and knees gardening, I am happy. Yes, happy and content with my life. There’s a little more to this story, I suppose. I sent this to my new guy, the Romantic, maybe I shall call him, who is at least nominally vanilla. I guess at some point I need to fill ya’ll in on what’s been going on on that front. But for now, sufficeRead more …