Tag Archives: D/s

Taking Back My Power

In the “better late than never – no really,” category, I’m chiming in on the SafeworD/s Club, “Tell Me About…” prompt for “Power Exchange.” Of course the meme has already closed, because that’s how I roll (ugh). But this topic is top of mind for me right now, as I navigate the ways in which V’s and my relationship has changed during this D/s hiatus. Power exchange, freely and consensually giving up one’s power to another, is a heady thing. It is at the core of being a submissive, of desiring to submit to another. To submit to, to give one’s power to, another. For me it is obviously sexual; perhaps not so obviously, it also has deeper meaning than just the sexual. When I started this with V, I stated, quite emphatically, that D/s was not what I wanted. I wanted a play partner. Someone to “do the thingsRead more …

#WickedWednesday – Pleasure

Jul 17, 2019 | Posted by in Kink &Scenes, Wicked Wednesday | 4

“How will I know you’re in pleasure, versus pain?” she asked, the first time we played. It’s a legitimate – and important – question, when negotiating a BDSM scene with someone new, for those on both sides of the slash. I’ve asked myself that when watching others’ scenes: How does the Top know that that person screaming is – though in pain – in a “good” place? That it’s good pain? That it’s even something like “pleasure”? I certainly can’t tell from my vantage point. Sometimes, in the midst of things, I can’t even tell if what I’m experiencing is pleasure or pain. She didn’t need to ask me when we played this time, though. She’d seen my dance, experienced me bouncing up on my tippy-toes and back down to the ground, arching my back and sticking out my ass in pure pleasure/pain. This pleasure, though, is different than whenRead more …

June 1 – Yep, It’s That Time Again

It’s Every Damn Day in June time again! I was so excited when I heard that Hyacinth of A Dissolute Life Means… was hosting the writing meme again this year. It’s not a prompting meme, in that it doesn’t give you a topic to write about each day – it is simply the prompt to write, Every. Damn. Day. I love it! Maybe it’s the submissive in me, but I do so much better when I’m told to do a thing. As part of my conditioning for the Grand Canyon adventure, I am (once again) trying to train myself to get up early. Left to my own (lazy) self, I would (literally) sleep in til 20 minutes before I have to leave for work in the AM. I love snuggling in my bed, under my quilt, with my pillows mounded all around. But. I only I have so many days,Read more …

Waiting for the tide to come in.

May 27, 2019 | Posted by in Being Poly, Everyday Jade, Relationship Stuff | 7

I was thinking about writing a Masturbation Monday tonight, but realized I don’t have it in me just now. I did work on my entry for the Smut Marathon, so there’s a spark of sexiness floating around out there, but really, it’s a feeble spark, and easily doused. It’s been that way for several weeks now. No sex, no kink, no erotic energy to speak of. There’s lots of reasons – life has been chaotic in ways just not conducive to sexiness – but damn. I miss it. I can’t remember the last time I had a good BDSM scene. And Saturday night’s sex with V was the first in almost the same amount of time. I feel like we’ve forgotten what that kind of energy feels like. And though I know (hope) it will come back, there’s this fear that it won’t. Kind of like the D/s has notRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – X is for XXX

“I’m going to go home, unpack, crawl into bed and administer a little self-care,” I say. “Oh? And what exactly does that ‘self-care’ entail?” I detect, even over the car’s speaker, a change in his tone. A very subtle edge. I am a master at sussing the nuances of his tone. It is an enthusiasm of mine to recognize the shift in his mood or attention or intention just by the subtleties of his tone of voice. I hesitate a moment. I’ve been flirting with the limits of this past(?) rule. I’ve pleasured myself many times without permission these past weeks. Yes, it has been satisfying, in terms of pure physical needs. And it has been interesting to find myself dipping into my old fantasies to use as wank material, deliberately avoiding the ones he has placed in my head these past years. But it also lacks…that special something thatRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – V is for Viper

He’s talking in my ear, saying nothing really, just words to fill up the space between us. Between my hotel room and where he is. I interrupt. “Where are you? Right now. What are you doing?” A pause. “On the couch. Looking at the trees…” “Are you alone in the house?” “Yes. For the moment. E is shopping for the weekend.” “Then what are you doing on the couch?” Another, longer, pause. “Where should I be?” “Well,” I say, slow, thoughtful. “I think you should be upstairs. In the room we share. In the bed we sleep in when I am there. Where you can pull your cock out and stroke yourself.” “You do, huh?” He’s quiet a moment. “Feeling kind of bossy, are you? I think maybe we need to create a protocol for when you decide you want to be a bossy kitty.” Then, a moment later, “That’sRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – Q is for Questions

So this post started on…oh…Thursday? But here it is Saturday and since it IS Saturday, and since I am definitely giving the shout-out to some pretty amazing bloggers that happen to host some kick-ass memes, I’ll include this as a “Share Our Shit Saturday” post. We will not be silenced. Q is for Questions Questions, I have so many questions! I really do. About everything. Well, maybe not about “everything.” Mostly about people. What makes them (me) work, why we do the things we do, who we are and how we got here. Our motivations, our hopes and dreams and sorrows and joys. Things like that. This blog is mostly that kind of questioning. Introspection. Musing on the human condition thru my own experiences. Though sometimes I recognize it for the self-centered endeavor that it is. Me, my life, my thoughts… Except that I’ve seen the domino effect that meRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – N is for No

“No” might seem to be an odd thing to be grateful for. Especially for a submissive woman who really likes to please. But in the past year I have learned the power of no – even when it hurts or isn’t want I want to hear or say. I’m not talking only about my own “no’s.” My No’s I have finally realized/accepted a truth about myself. I used to think I was shy, although I admit, even then, it didn’t feel like it quite fit. I learned, particularly in the past year, that what I am is an introvert. That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy socializing. When I finally do get myself “out there,” interacting with people in a social setting, I enjoy it very much! But my enjoyment has a very definite window of opportunity, and when that window closes, I’m done. It could be three nights inRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – A is for Abundance

This month I am once again participating – officially, this time – in the A to Z Blogging Challenge. It’s been for around for a few years now – ten, actually, according to their website, though I have only participated in it unofficially once, last year. (I didn’t hear about it till after the cut-off to sign-up had closed, so I just did it on my own.) I can’t recall just now if I actually finished it (what, me, not finish a thing? ha!) but I do remember that it gave me a boost in motivation and a prompt to write to daily, which I always enjoy. This time I am an “official” A to Z’er – you can find me listed on this spreadsheet along with dozens of other bloggers. Originally I hadn’t planned to blog to a theme (isn’t sex and kink and relationships enough of a theme?) but after givingRead more …

The Erotic Journal Challenge Catch-Up Week

I was thrilled when Brigit of Brigit Writes announced that she was posting a “catch-up” week for the Erotic Journal Challenge prompts, allowing writers to answer any (or all) of the questions they had missed the first time around. (Or to add another post to one they had answered previously.) I had answered the first one, but had been too busy or just felt that I didn’t have enough to say that I hadn’t already said about the others. So this gives me a chance to answer some of the questions I missed in Q & A format, and not feel like I have to do a whole blog post on each one. We’ll see how it goes – if I get long-winded on any of them I may break it out on its own. Prompt #2: Discovery – When did you discover your own sexuality? For example, when wasRead more …