Tag Archives: relationships

G is for Goodbye

Apr 7, 2018 | Posted by in A-Z Blogging Challenge, Life Before | 2

“Goodbye Norma Jean,” in particular. Why that? Well. Let me tell you. I’d been flailing about for a few days, reaching for, and never quite finding, a good “G” word. Of course there is “Gratitude.” And that is always an important one for me to muse on, to internalize, to write and think about. But…every other word so far has felt like…inspiration. A gift, urging me to write, in a time when writing hasn’t been a thing. How do I explain it, when a thing is so important to you…when it’s such an integral part of you that imagining it gone is inconceivable…and then it is. Gone. Just like that. A neat, precise incision cut out of your very center, like with an apple corer. A hole punched in you. That was how my writing has been for me. Until just these last few days. I don’t know what itRead more …

E is for Everything

I go from nothing to everything in the blink of an eye. One day I’m not writing at all, not participating in any blogging memes, not even thinking about writing for publication again…the next I’m in a daily writing challenge, mulling over new calls for submission, and writing like a mad woman. I’ve barely exercised for weeks and all of sudden I have joined a yoga studio, have downloaded a daily exercise app, and am looking at a biking challenge. I don’t go to the grocery store or cook at home for weeks, and then I lose myself in the grocery store for two hours, carefully planning out each breakfast, lunch and dinner for the next week two weeks. And oh yes, lest I forget: I have decided to also participate in a daily orgasm meme. Manic much? No, it’s not that. But I do reach a point of saturation,Read more …

A New Year’s Eve at the Beach

Round about a month ago, I got the sudden impulse to see the ocean before the year ends. I know, I’d just spent five days in the mountains, and a long weekend at Lake Michigan this past summer, but nothing works to soothe my soul like the sound of waves, the smell of salt water, the sight of the endless horizon of the sea. Adam, being the lovely soul that he is, agreed to┬áindulge me, and we planned a twelve-and-a-half-hour road trip to the Carolina coast on the spur of the moment. And that’s I ended up by the beach for four days over the New Year’s Eve weekend, and I couldn’t have been happier. I had enjoyed my time with Les in the mountains, and felt I was very relaxed there, but after just a couple days away with Adam I realized I probably wasn’t as relaxed as IRead more …

Of Subdrop & Self-Care

Dec 5, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Kinky Stuff, Life Before, Relationship Stuff | 2

Whoa…it’s been awhile since I’ve had a bona fide case of subdrop. Long enough that I can’t really remember when it last was. I didn’t even drop after the event a few weekends ago, when I spent two full days and nights with both guys, got cut on, and beat up, and made to fuck a dragon cock in public while Viper shoved a glass dildo up my ass. Oh, and I happened to be wrapped up tight in neon pink vet-wrap so that I looked like an amputee. With a ballgag in my mouth and vet-wrap over my eyes too, up on a table where a dungeon full of kinksters could watch as I was made to fuck myself silly, grinding helplessly against Baldy, the dragon cock in my pussy and V pushing the glass wand in and out of my ass. It’s that part that is most embarrassing,Read more …

Labels

Sep 21, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Everyday Jade, Who Is Pieces of Jade? | 1

I learned a brand new-to-me term for a poly partner: anchor partner. I’m familiar with primary partner, of course, and nesting partner, but “anchor” is a new one to me. I believe it encompasses exactly what role Adam is in my life, though. I’ve never had an issue with labels. Language and the words we use are how we communicate ideas to one another. Unlike some people, I don’t feel that a label is necessarily limiting, nor does it have to be all-encompassing. To me, a label is a starting point. A place where we can pause and reflect, and then expound upon it – or not – as needed. When I was with W and Adam, W insisted on a hierarchical approach to labeling our relationships. Adam was “primary,” W was “secondary.” He insisted on it being that way. But it was not very long before I knew thatRead more …

His.

Sep 8, 2017 | Posted by in Kinky Stuff | 1

I was in a weird place. I’d had a perfectly lovely weekend away with my daughter – an accidental mom-and-daughter camping trip in Sleeping Bear Dunes, Michigan, which happened because both her boyfriend and Adam were unable to accompany us as originally planned. I’m not ashamed to say I was fine with the change. I would have enjoyed their company, but having the Girl all to myself all weekend was a real treat. I’m also not ashamed to admit I had some trepidations: I hadn’t camped in more than 3 years, and not without an able male-bodied person in 10 years or more. We also had an 8 hour drive each way, and I had rented a 4-wheel drive truck to haul our gear. Not my usual mode of transportation. But! We went, we survived, we had an amazing time. BUT…I’d also left with unresolved issues between Viper and I.Read more …

I think I can.

Jul 20, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly, Everyday Jade | 2

I think I can do this. No, I really do. I think I can be happy. I think I can be content. I think I can accept what is, without pining for what is not. There’s been many times in the past – what’s it been, almost 2 years? – that I haven’t been sure of that. That I’ve doubted and wondered “why” and wished I was anywhere, in any other relationship(s), than the one(s) I am in. That it was all too hard, too complicated, too not-what-I-wanted out of my relationship(s). Out of my life. Sometimes I still feel that way. I love Viper and would be devastated not to have him in my life and I adore and crave the D/s dynamic we have created; I still love and appreciate Adam as much as I ever did (if not more so), even after almost 18 years; and IRead more …

Mountains, Rocks, Rolling Stones & Hummingbirds

Jan 28, 2017 | Posted by in Being Poly | 2

Adam is a rock. Warren was a rolling stone. V says he is a mountain. I’m a hummingbird. I have always said Adam is my rock. Stable and solid, safe and secure, but not immovable. It takes a good bit of effort, but I can nudge him this way and that, and even pick him up and carry him about if needed. He’s always there for me to fly home to when I need solidity and security. Warren was a rolling stone. Secure and strong, too, but more easily moved, and with the added bonus of being able/willing to initiate movement – to roll – on his own. Viper is, in his own words, a mountain. He’s the immovable center of the world around which his wife and daughter – and now me – live their lives, returning to succor in his steadfastness, knowing he cannot be moved or shaken.Read more …

Catching Up

Author’s note: I’ve started and stopped this post so many times, written and pondered and wanted to finish it and not done so time and again. I finally gave it up as too long ago to matter, but now here I am again, though the “why” I’m back revisiting family relationships and dynamics is different: I’m staying at my mom’s this week to keep her company while my stepdad goes back East to sit vigil on his youngest sister, who has been in a coma since a heart attack last week, and who was diagnosed with inoperable, stage 4 lung cancer the month that this trip happened. I had never met her before this and now…I have bonds to this family that weren’t mine until this trip. I’m struggling to disentangle my feelings about it all. So this post begins with my musings from yesterday about all this, and thenRead more …