Tag Archives: V

Greetings from Chicagoland

Oct 16, 2019 | Posted by in Kink & Scenes, Wicked Wednesday | 2

Hellooo all you lovely people! Much like my posts from the Grand Canyon (that, yes, I still haven’t finished) this is going to be another discombobulated, rambling, back-and-forth-in-time blog post. The thing is, it’s just too damn hard to make it all coherent afterwards, so…you get a mish-mash. I’ll try to organize it by day at least… Friday Afternoon So hey ho! Here I am, ensconced at a hotel with about 300 other kinky folk – well, spankos, to be precise. (I just got told downstairs by a nice boy from London that that he was told at his first spanking party to “avoid the BDSM/kinky crowd,” because our kind and his kind don’t mix. In my many years of mixing in all the groups, I have found that this tends to have more than a drop of truth in it, but I’m pretty sure I left him with aRead more …

Taking Back My Power

In the “better late than never – no really,” category, I’m chiming in on the SafeworD/s Club, “Tell Me About…” prompt for “Power Exchange.” Of course the meme has already closed, because that’s how I roll (ugh). But this topic is top of mind for me right now, as I navigate the ways in which V’s and my relationship has changed during this D/s hiatus. Power exchange, freely and consensually giving up one’s power to another, is a heady thing. It is at the core of being a submissive, of desiring to submit to another. To submit to, to give one’s power to, another. For me it is obviously sexual; perhaps not so obviously, it also has deeper meaning than just the sexual. When I started this with V, I stated, quite emphatically, that D/s was not what I wanted. I wanted a play partner. Someone to “do the thingsRead more …

Day 27 – A Musical Night

When it;s good, it’s very, very good. V came over last night. We went to listen to music at the Garden and have a little picnic; it was a pleasant evening, if a bit cold and wet, since it had stormed earlier. But at least the free concert wasn’t canceled – they have already canceled 3 out of the 4 weekly concerts due to rain so far this summer. One of the reasons V switched our date nights to be alternating Tuesday/Wednesdays was so that we could go to them – it’s a favorite summertime activity of mine – so the cancellations have been doubly disappointing. Anyway, in spite of the not-ideal conditions, it was nice, feeling like we were on a date. Walking back to the house afterward we got into the never-ending discussion we have regarding schedules, though. When we got to the front door I put myRead more …

Day 13 – More Time Machine

Jun 15, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019, Sinful Sunday | 15

In order to make this post square with the rules of Sinful Sunday (it’s about the image – one you’ve taken yourself or had taken of you) I broke up Day 13 into two posts. This one is about AFTER the game… Day 13 – A Different Game Prior to going to the bar, V set up a “game” of our own – I had picked out two canes during a previous game, one I “liked” and one I didn’t like. Whatever the score was, he would take the difference between the scores and take that x10. If the Blues won, he’d hit me that many times with the “good” cane. If they lost, he’d use the bad one. That night, as this, the Blues won. To the song “Gloria” (for some reason that was the Blue’s theme song this year) on repeat, he whacked me 30x with a whangeeRead more …

Day 13 – Time Machine

Jun 15, 2019 | Posted by in Every Damn Day in June 2019 | 0

We’re going back in a time machine to the posts that I wrote the other days but didn’t post. Mostly because I don’t want to revise them to reflect the fact that I’m posting it today even though I wrote it the other day. Writer’s prerogative.  Day 13 – A Hockey Game I actually DID write yesterday. Quite a lot. But I didn’t get that post (feedback on Round 5 of the Smut Marathon) finished in time to post it. I was at my local corner bar with V for the seventh and last game of the Blues vs Bruins for the Stanley Cup Final, and I was sadly mistaken if I was going to be able to focus enough to write while the game was on. So I’m taking the liberty of pretending I’m in a time machine this morning and pretending that I wrote up our adventure lastRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – W is for a Wonderful Weekend of We

I am home after the long weekend. Had a great time, in spite of my initial “traveling alone” anxieties, which, as I drove home today, seemed so silly and out-of-proportion. Who was that that had felt all that? But, hindsight is always like that; I recognize, in the now, looking back, that that is anxiety’s job, to blow up every fear and insecurity into looming beasts. I’m getting better about recognizing that in the moment, though, too, and taming the anxiety beast with appropriate self-care, so there’s that. It’s all a process. In spite of those initial rough moments, the weekend blossomed in lovely, unexpected ways. There was the right amount of kink and play, the right amount of togetherness between V and I, Ad and I and the three of us. The three of us had a very satisfying scene on Friday night, and V and I spent aRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – N is for No

“No” might seem to be an odd thing to be grateful for. Especially for a submissive woman who really likes to please. But in the past year I have learned the power of no – even when it hurts or isn’t want I want to hear or say. I’m not talking only about my own “no’s.” My No’s I have finally realized/accepted a truth about myself. I used to think I was shy, although I admit, even then, it didn’t feel like it quite fit. I learned, particularly in the past year, that what I am is an introvert. That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy socializing. When I finally do get myself “out there,” interacting with people in a social setting, I enjoy it very much! But my enjoyment has a very definite window of opportunity, and when that window closes, I’m done. It could be three nights inRead more …

#AtoZChallenge – A is for Abundance

This month I am once again participating – officially, this time – in the A to Z Blogging Challenge. It’s been for around for a few years now – ten, actually, according to their website, though I have only participated in it unofficially once, last year. (I didn’t hear about it till after the cut-off to sign-up had closed, so I just did it on my own.) I can’t recall just now if I actually finished it (what, me, not finish a thing? ha!) but I do remember that it gave me a boost in motivation and a prompt to write to daily, which I always enjoy. This time I am an “official” A to Z’er – you can find me listed on this spreadsheet along with dozens of other bloggers. Originally I hadn’t planned to blog to a theme (isn’t sex and kink and relationships enough of a theme?) but after givingRead more …

A Hairy Question

Mar 23, 2019 | Posted by in Relationship Stuff, Writing About Kink | 0

V asked me today, “What would you do/how would you react if I were to tell you to not color your hair or do anything to it? To just let it be?” He wasn’t asking me about hairstyles. It’s a complicated question, especially right now, when our D/s is on the back burner, waiting for us to figure things out again. Or me to figure things out again. I’m not sure I could say it’s all the way on the back burner, though: I was over at V’s last night, and little bits of it crept in, here and there. I’m not talking about out-and-out play; we did play, but it felt oddly bereft of D/s, more like topping. Which was fine. I needed a good ass-whipping, and that was what I got. But in many of our other interactions last night, the D/s was there, simmering under the surface,Read more …

Forward by the scruff of my neck

I’m moving forward, if incrementally, into a more stable emotional space. I am hoping that feeling better will spur my motivation to write, as well – you know, like the sexy, naughty stuff – but we will see. At the moment, I’m not feeling any sexy, naughty stuff, much less doing any sexy naughty stuff, so it’s kind of a moot point, but, you know, it could happen. Or I could write fiction. As it stands, V and I are kind of in a holding pattern. We’re not off, but we’re not exactly on, either, as I struggle through the emotional morass I have found myself in. We’re holding still. We’re communicating (sometimes a lot) and mostly in healthy ways, and still seeing each other our two times/week. Last weekend we even saw each other in the middle of a weekend day (gasp.) But things aren’t entirely – or even remotely –Read more …